Friday, January 04, 2013

From Fear Through the Eyes of Sadness

I very rarely have songs stuck in my head and when this happens I hardly ever know the lyrics.  My brain plays this trick with me that I can't remember both lyrics and tune. If I hear the tune I can sing the song, but they very rarely go in tandem. Over the last few days I have had a song stuck in my head though, and the interesting thing is that it was a song that I had probably not heard in 3 years. It is a song from Coheed and Cambria called The Road and the Damned.  Here it is in lyric form adapted a bit, look it up if you are interested, it is quite beautiful. 

I believed in the world right in front of me. But now along these empty streets this curse haunts these memories of a man and all he's lost. There is no time to think about it, no time to breathe.  If I had a way back, I'd ride through the dark and the dawn because that man you love don't live anymore.  I can't go home again.  Tonight, you'll sleep, with no fear of what might become of me, my dear.  Within these end of days, Where this longing turns this man to prey on a love that yearns to die.  I believed in the world once in front of me, well, now that's gone.  


 I have not been sleeping well these last few days, I think I have gotten something of like 7 hours of sleep in the last 72 or so.  I keep waking up after about thirty minutes with a strong sense of loss and more often than not I have been in cold sweats.  This sounds bad, but I don't think that this is really a problem.  I was struggling the other day with some really troubling situations, and I think my body is just reacting to that. I have found in the last few years that things like this happen to me on occasion. My mind thinks I am in trouble or something, so it turns on some sort of master switch in order to protect me from whatever it is that is bothering me.  I will eventually fall asleep and the sun will be shining when I awake. 


Due to this I have been fairly productive at work, since I don't really have any reason to leave except to eat and take a shower.

 I am curious if this is a problem with people who spend a majority of their time thinking or if it is more of a problem with me due to being just a few clicks from crazy at points. 

One Day,
C. Fletcher

1 comment:

  1. you aren't crazy really....but sounds kinda like a panic attack scenerio....which is kinda what you said anyway!

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